A Hearing Loss & Late Deafened Blog

Today is, I hate hearing people day for me.

In Aging and hearing loss, Cochlear Implants, Deaf Culture, Deafness, Hard of hearing culture, Hearing aids, Hearing Loss, Life, Lip Reading, Miscellaneous Ramblings, Relationships on March 15, 2011 at 5:36 pm

I am so tired of having to explain to people why I cannot understand, let alone hear, what someone is saying.  Why is it so difficult for hearing people to understand? Is it that they are clueless? Is it that they don’t want to understand?  Do they understand but they’re afraid of hearing loss?  Or is it just the fact, that they have no patience to understand.

Personally, I think it’s a combination of everything except fear of wanting to understand.  I think people just think, when you say you can’t hear them or you don’t understand them that they just cannot be bothered with having to change the way they ordinarily do things, for us to hear or understand what they are saying. I don’t like to use the words accomodating us less someone interprets it as my feeling entitled.

Too many bad experiences to go into here but today is my I hate hearing people day.

Deaf cultured individuals have sign language to communicate and use interpreters when necessary. However, what happens to those of  us who are hearing impaired, late deafened or deaf in the hearing world. 

How do others deal with the hearing world?

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  1. I have to take a proactive stance when meeting new people, step outside my comfort zone and tell them upfront that I cannot hear or understand what they are saying. I explain that I wear hearing aids, but that doesn’t help 100%. I also explain that I hear better on the right side (and situate myself accordingly) and lip read. It is a lot of information for a new person to remember and sometimes they forget that I am hearing impaired. Most of the time, I stop them, and they quickly apologize.

    I asked a parent of a deaf teen why my husband of 22 years still “talks to the walls” instead of looking at me. She explained that it is because I sometimes respond to a simple question without having him look at me, whereas a deaf child, you are consistently looking at them ALL the time.

    As I said earlier, most of the people I’ve met have been accommodating and try to communicate with me; the others? Well, they can take a hike. 😀

  2. It can be very annoying, especially when you tell hearing people your needs. I felt similarly frustrated today while using the Captel to talk to a medical technician at one of my doctor’s offices. He had a thick accent and I couldn’t understand him well. With the delay in the captel, I had to wait to answer his questions. I told him I was very, very hard of hearing and that I was reading his words on a “special phone” and to please be patient because there was a delay. With each question, he would begin repeating, “Hello, hello? are you still there?” I had to explain three times I was waiting for his words to pop up on the screen and to be patient. I felt like hanging up on him.

    I’m really sorry you had a bad day too.

  3. I can understand that annoyance you had on the phone. If I had to explasin something like that for a thrird time I would be frustrated too. To calm myself down, I take time out. At home its easy to do that, but say if I’m at work, I may have to grin or bear for a bit, then disappear where someone cannot get me. One miinute or two minutes doing this at work is enough for me if needed. But at home, I will take time out for ten minutes.

  4. I’m sorry you’ve had such a horrible time. As a hearing person, it is sometimes difficult to imagine not being able to convey needs/wants to others throughout the day. For the past couple of years, I’ve been studying ASL (KY School for the Deaf and my local public school system). It is sometimes difficult to practice because I’m not instantly immersed in Deaf Culture. However, learning about communication (also studying French/Spanish)–communication is very important, so I try to communicate in many different ways (including pen/paper).

  5. It’s time to get Tee shirts printed up!

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